Show me the money!

..is exactly what I'd be saying if I was winning. As my last entry suggests things have been a tad harsh recently. The usual, getting it in mostly as 70% or more as favourite, and losing every 60/40 and coinflip (sorry, no bad beat rule is being enforced again, I'll shut up). Since my $7.5k losing day earlier in the month it's been one low to the next and I really have very little enthusiasm right now or will to grind it out. Don't get me wrong, I'm trying, but as my mate Dubai says "when it's bad, it's REALLY bad". Too right.

So, what to do? I resorted to what I usually do during such a shit spell, firstly I go absolutely stone crazy to anything and anyone in my path, then I settle down, force myself to suck it up and grind where it invariably gets worse than I could ever have hoped against beforehand. Then I get depressed and do my finances to see where I stand, always guaranteed to cheer me up. I actually worked it out, if I factor in my rakeback for the month, that I'm slightly over breakeven for the downswing. Sick eh, and it feels a lot worse. When you're used to grinding $20k a month and it suddenly comes to a halt in ridiculous fashion you're left scratching your head, and me being the perennial paniker usually blow my top in some sort of hilarious fashion. I never really mean what I say, as I have grown to learn, but it still fucks me off nonetheless.

Speaking of being fucked off, why don't the anonymous haters do just that. Don't think I don't know who it is either (all 3 of you). You really are pondscum, get a life. Lose some weight, too.

Future plans are that I will play tomorrow and Thursday, but my mate is coming to stay for the weekend so I'll probably ease off and get some perspective. Or alcohol, both work for me. I plan to travel to Walsall for the UKPT to see if I can better last time's shambles. I must mention that Nick Slade apparently told Dubai that I must've misheard him and he wasn't trying to give me the rubdown at all, so I guess I'll say hi if he's around. I've also just booked my room for the Paddy Power Irish Open in April.. so that's two live jaunts and I don't intend to make anymore within that time frame unless I get a big result that allows me to ease off the online grind. Back to work HARD on Monday, and I will suck it up whatever comes my way.

Thanks for reading,
JPK