Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Greetings from Goa

Howdy y'all

Myself, Dubai, Benno, "Miss" Joey Lovelady (according to the tournament entry sheet, I guess he could pass for a butch lesbian with that hairstyle) et all arrived yesterday after a fantastic flight with Thomson and a wonderful 2 hour+ guided tour through the beautiful, tranquil non-polluted high economy and thoroughly safe city of Goa in the finest taxis money can buy, with drivers to match. I've never really considerd death during my 24 years on this planet, until yesterday. Shocking.

The resort itself is pretty cool, private beach and a pool which has a bar you can swim upto. Tourney starts on the 2nd and all I've seen is "name" players with big results, so obviously we're the value here. They're talking about 150 runners or so, one of us surely has to go deep.
Hiring a yacht tomorrow I think it's £200 an hour between 11 of us. Actually, 10 of us, Ben "Sunday8pm" Mayhew has freerolled onto the trip via eating pineapple covered in sand and watermelon with no hands, but he still has 2 tasks to complete before allowed entry to the all inclusive day. Should be fun.

I'm probably going to head off to Thailand after we're done here, I can't stomach that ridiculously bad flight home, and since I've travelled all this way, I may as well go for at least a couple of weeks.

Oh, and surprisingly there's plenty of ladies here, and only one bar, so they can't escape us, we've just got to prevent Julian Thew from cramping our style, I hope he doesn't bust out the pink and brown cardigan again.

Lots more to tell you about, but I'm typed out, and we're going to a restaurant soon because Dubai doesn't want to eat the free buffet they're putting on for us every night. Cheerio

Best
J

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Reality

Third post within a 6 hour or so period. I've just learned that the train that derailed, the one I was supposed to be on, has had one fatality and 8 critical injuries. Granted, it flipped over on the stop ten minutes after mine, but that's still very eery. I may get outdrawn by muppets all day every day on the tables, but at least I still have my health.

Can't believe this run

I know it's only a few hours since I've posted, but I just trashed my office in an absolute fit of rage due to ANOTHER fucking run of ridiculous beats, topped off by this gem in the 12k, you will notice the villain is quite familiar:

Game #3252293513: Hold'em NL (400/800) - 2007/02/24 - 17:46:07 (DST)
Table "1" Seat 7 is the button.
Seat 1: deeganc (9696 in chips)
Seat 2: SheGrant (26605 in chips)
Seat 3: Obs200 (12067.50 in chips)
Seat 4: JPK69 (8729.50 in chips)
Seat 5: 1_9_1_3 (17848 in chips)
Seat 7: ><(((*> (11477 in chips)
Seat 8: Jayjay72 (21511 in chips)
Seat 9: outdrawme (19559 in chips)
Seat 10: KipsterDK (21762 in chips)
Jayjay72: posts the ante 100
outdrawme: posts the ante 100
KipsterDK: posts the ante 100
deeganc: posts the ante 100
SheGrant: posts the ante 100
Obs200: posts the ante 100
JPK69: posts the ante 100
1_9_1_3: posts the ante 100>
<(((*>: posts the ante 100
Jayjay72: posts small blind 400
outdrawme: posts big blind 800

----- HOLE CARDS -----
dealt to JPK69 [Tc Th]
KipsterDK: calls 800
deeganc: folds
SheGrant: folds
Obs200: folds
JPK69: raises to 3200
1_9_1_3: folds
><(((*>: folds
Jayjay72: folds
outdrawme: folds
KipsterDK: calls 2400

----- FLOP -----
[9h Td 9c]
KipsterDK: checks
JPK69: checks
----- TURN -----
[9h Td 9c][Qc]
KipsterDK: checks
JPK69: bets 3200
KipsterDK: raises to 18462 and is all-in
JPK69: is all-in 2229.50
Returned uncalled bets 13,032.50 to KipsterDK

----- RIVER ----- [9h Td 9c Qc][Qd]
----- SHOW DOWN -----
KipsterDK: shows [Qh Kh] (A Full House, Queens full of Nines)
JPK69: shows [Tc Th] (A Full House, Tens full of Queens)
KipsterDK collected 19359 from Main pot

I've had enough, Seriously. Ran like this for 2 months and it's beyond the joke, it's actually taking the piss. This was in the final 20, but in reality, it's happening in the majority of GBP90+ sixpaks I play, or I run a steal into a big hand. I've never ever had a run as sick or bad as this, I never want to see a poker table again. I'd even cancel Goa if I was able to but too little, too late. It's just not fair.

Going, Going, Goa!!

Okay, maybe headlines aren't my thing but you get the picture. Early Tuesday morning I jet off to Goa, India for the APC (http://www.asianpokerclassic.com/). I am looking forward to the event, but I have been soured by the hassle I've had to go through to get my visa.

That's right, everyone who visits India has to go to the Indian Consulate in Central London to get a visa. You can risk sending it off, but stats reckon they lost 1000's in the last 12 months and I wasn't risking it. In this day and age. Yes. Utter nonsense. So I get there in the pouring rain at 8am, after spending an hour on the cattle market that is the London Underground feeling slightly peeved. The night I spent on my mates bedroom floor probably didn't help either. There's no one there, no ques or anything, WHOOPEE. Then I see a sign saying visas this way, with an arrow pointing round the corner. Yep, you guessed it, I peeked round the corner and there's a que a mile long, mostly consisting of animals, er I mean traveller types.

So I stand there, snow and rain pelting me in the face thinking how great my life is for the best part of three hours back and forth before finally getting all my stuff sorted and its about 11am. I come out to no que and people are casually wandering in. That's a tilt moment right there, folks. Thank the lord there was no wifi in the vicinity otherwise my Crypto account would've taken a hammering. It's like when you're on a cash table, grinding away and waiting for a hand against the table lunatic all day, when some short stacking cunt comes in and 5 minutes later he's shit the deck, quadrupled up, busted the LAG hero and fleed.

So off to meet the new BF poker bod Paul Twaddle, pick up my snazzy BF shirts that I am obliged to wear for whoring myself and then back to Euston to catch my train home. Apparently my ticket isn't valid for this particular Euston-Preston journey, and there's no seats left in coach, so it's off to First Class at a one way price of £170. Whoooooo. However it's not all bad as I get home to learn the train I was supposed to catch was the one that ended up in a ditch somewhere. So, I guess that's the equivalent of hitting a 3 outter after being sucked out on in a massive pot, alls well that ends well but still feel aggreived.

Myself and poker are a little shi-ite at the moment, so I at least have something in common with my Asian counterparts (oh, how my punfully intended jokes are hilarious). It's nothing too disastrous, but I'm just stuck in a rut, but as long as I keep getting my cards in with KK vs. Ax, it's only a matter of time before I hit GIN and get back on the winning trail, hopefully in India.

All jokes aside I am really looking forward to this trip, some of my best friends are from India and they are amongst the most helpful and friendly people in the world. I'm not sure I'll be partaking in the curry breakfast buffets I've heard about but I do love my spicy food so I'll give it a whirl, however I am hoping everyone in the poker tournament gets together and unanimously agree not to eat anything that will make the bowels, erm, slightly gurgly the day before, we have to endure enough shit as it is on the tables without having to smell it all day long. $1 million guaranteed, I am due a really big result and this could just be the place. If I cash well, I'll probably end up doing a tour of the islands for a month, but then I'll probably convince Joey Lovelady & Blacklist into doing it anyway.

If you're going out there, drop me a message here or an email on jfarrer69 at aol dot com.. and if you recognise me, be sure to say hello and offer a glass or bottle of Chablis. Yes, Thew, I'm looking at you ;-)

All the breast,
JPK

PS Good luck to the new Sky Poker programme that's started up (http://www.skypoker.com/), my mate Ed Giddins will be on the show and it's being advertised to high hell on the big football
matches, the Sky Sports website et al so I expect it to really take off in the next couple of months (they even got Helen Chamberlain on, I'd still bok her for old times sake from my masterbatory teen years) and be really beneficial for the UK scene. We need all the help we can get!

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Action packed week

That's how I can describe it best. Doing my bollocks at the moment and running sick bad with no upswing for a month, I'm a bit fucked off with poker, so I'll leave that for now. No point crying over spilt milk and all that.

Other fronts are looking okay I guess. Walsall was a laugh, a couple of sick nights out & met a bunch of top people such as Julian Thew, Ed Giddins et al. It's not the first time I've met the guys, but it's got to the point now where everyone's getting to know me on a first name basis, probably for all the wrong reasons. Also, despite the fact I can't pull in a tug of war contest in my hometown, women actually find me slightly desirable when I'm off galavanting on poker trips. I assume this is delusion caused by intoxication or the fact that I hang around with individuals far uglier than myself, probably a mixture of the two.

Also, I grabbed an opportunity to sign myself up for the Asian Poker Classic in Goa during the first week of March. I will be representing Betfair during the event but I'm not wearing that stripey fucking monstrosity of a shirt they try and fob off on people, they're gonna have to send me something a bit better than that. Joey Lovelady, Blacklist Benno, Dubai and their crew are all going along so I am going to lock myself in my room for the week for fear of bankruptcy.

The Betfair thing is a one time only deal unless I avoid the mandatory bumshagging just before the big money. I'm sure if I can get a result or three sites will come knocking for me to play for them, I've got a couple of small-ish offers already but nothing I'm overly interested in. If people want JPK on their team it's gotta be worth my while, and I don't think anyone thinks I'm a justifiable risk right now in terms of what I'd be looking for (well, apart from the fact I'm a rake machine, decent online winner, journalist and general sexyboy/arsehole). But with Goa, the UKPT, Irish Open, Betfair Asian Tour and WSOP on the cards, it's looking pretty stacked for 2007 already. Maybe next year will be my year in terms of chasing the TV cameras. 2007 will be defining as far as poker goes, so I need to get my head down and work. Papa wants a brand new carrrrrrrrrrrr..

Regards,
JPK

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Sam Allardyce is the fucking man

http://home.skysports.com/list.aspx?hlid=447456&CPID=8&clid=30&lid=2&title=Big+Sam+slams+'Fat,+lazy+nation'&channel=football_home&

How the FA let this guy slip through their fingers in favour of politically correct, corporate friendly yes man Steve McClaren just defies belief. This man is my new idol.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

MTT Frustrations, or am I just moaning for the sake of it?

I sit here typing this after just finishing 6th in the Mansion $100k guaranteed for $4600, a little miffed it's not just shy of $19.5k more. It's just occurred to me that it's really come to something when I am unhappy winning such an amount, thinking of the lost earnings. I've won over $15k in the past 5 or 6 days and haven't really broken a smile over it. I'm not entirely sure whether this is a good thing or not, I'd venture to say a little of both, but I need to lighten up.

I totally was crushing the field, just like I did in the £8k the other day, and had nearly 2x2nd place chips for 2 hours, when a muppet decided to jam on me with AJo against my jacks, an ace on the river stopped my momentum as I was accumulating chips at an alarming rate, so I had to just sit tight and hope to win my 60/40s (I did, winning 3 of them, before raising all in with 99 into QQ). What can you do.. it's just extremely disappointing to run into that when the pay incraments are so big as they invariably are in 500+ runner fields. Maybe I'll have a tad more luck at UKPT. Then again, I am more than happy to collect $50k+ a month "unluckily" :D.

So yeah, everything's looking a bit rosier, and the trolls with their negative shit seem to have disappeared from the comment area, perhaps because I am owning them on the tables again, who knows.

Best,
JPK

Wednesday, February 7, 2007

A slight change in fortunes

Won $6k or so last night. Of course I'm happy, but I've got an empty feeling. Probably due to the fact that I absolutely DESTROYED the £8k on Crypto (I am playing the mid-month leaderboard to try and win a Monte Carlo seat). I had 3 x chips of 2nd going into the last two tables, 4 x on the FT and 5 x short handed. 5-1 lead heads up (he was at that point 3 times), get it all in AQ v A5, he spikes a 5 on the turn, and makes the comeback of all comebacks, costing me £1k and some important leaderboard points. Frankly, I just ran over everybody and it was a total injustice I didn't win. What made it worse was that straight after I crashed out of the $4k for the same leaderboard in 14th after losing TT vs A9 for a 50k pot.. he called the all-in of course and the first card a deserved ace.. GG WP TY CU FO..

I should be happy with the winnings, but I am such a brutal perfectionist that I was absolutely raging. I've calmed down a little now and I hope I can continue with some solid winning days to get back on track. It's been a rough few weeks and a little success was nice.

Hawko's up on Sunday as he needs to collect ten grand off some geezer in Manchester, sounds like fun.. then it's off to Walsall for the UKPT, so it'll be either tales of joy or woe in the next week..

RegardsJPK

Monday, February 5, 2007

I think this says it all

Standard outdraw lately, this is a £120 sixpak, KipsterDK is a known winner.. suffice to say, this hand history sums up the last month, and my current mood.

Game #4421313334: Hold'em NL (50/100) - 2007/02/05 - 19:04:33 (DST)
Table "1" Seat 1 is the button.
Seat 1: JPK69 (2242 in chips)
Seat 2: jnicholso (1938 in chips)
Seat 3: _tiltiana (711 in chips)
Seat 4: KipsterDK (4109 in chips)
jnicholso: posts small blind 50
_tiltiana: posts big blind 100
----- HOLE CARDS -----
dealt to JPK69 [9d Ad]
KipsterDK: raises to 250
JPK69: calls 250
jnicholso: folds
_tiltiana: folds
----- FLOP ----- [Ac 8d 4d]
KipsterDK: bets 250
JPK69: raises to 900
KipsterDK: raises to 3859 and is all-in
JPK69: is all-in 1092
Returned uncalled bets 1,867 to KipsterDK
----- TURN ----- [Ac 8d 4d][6c]
----- RIVER ----- [Ac 8d 4d 6c][2h]
----- SHOW DOWN -----
KipsterDK: shows [6s Ah] (Two Pairs, Aces and Sixes, Eight high)
JPK69: shows [9d Ad] (A Pair of Aces, Nine high)
KipsterDK collected 4634 from Main pot
----- SUMMARY -----
Total pot 4634 Main pot 4634 Rake 0
Board [Ac 8d 4d 6c 2h]
Seat 1: JPK69 (button) showed [9d Ad] and lost with A Pair of Aces, Nine high
Seat 2: jnicholso (small blind) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 3: _tiltiana (big blind) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: KipsterDK showed [6s Ah] and won (4634) with Two Pairs, Aces and Sixes, Eight high

Regards
JPK

PS I lied about the standard outdraw, they usually hit their 3 carder 8/10 times, not 2 carder as in the above example